Portrait of a Pablo

Current obsessions: Peanuts cartoons (notice desk calendar and decorations) and War and Peace (because it was mentioned in a Peanuts cartoon, of course)

Thoughts of leaving and thoughts of staying...

Today has been a day of peaceful contentment. As I rode around the bustling city full of cars, buses, motorcycles and the sounds of horns and traffic this morning on the way to and from the market that I love so dearly, I sometimes caught myself smiling for no reason - as if I had a secret that no one else knew.

I am in the center of my Heavenly Father's Will.

I am right where He wants me.

I have been extremely disappointed with myself this year. I have wanted to give up and go home more times than I can count. I hate that I have even considered that as an option and even given it any credit by emailing it and speaking it aloud.

Of course it's hard! Isn't it supposed to be hard? This is not just a physical battle related to living in a third-world country without safe independence or self-sufficiency. This is a spiritual battle. I moved here to fight a battle for 22 souls for 11 months. Now with so much time passed, I can see that I didn't know what I was walking into. It seems like a stronger, more committed, more energetic person would have been better for the job.

But God called me here.

There have been a few specific times when I thought I was finished. I thought I was empty and that I couldn't go on. Contract or no contract, for one reason or another, I thought it was time for me to board that plane and return to the safety, comfort, support, and love of my home.

But each time, my sovereign God closed that door and kept me here.

He has kept me in His will.

He held me where He wanted me.

Those days of wanting to give up and go home have been some of my absolute lowest points on this journey, but the time that has followed has proven every time to be a rebounding high.

That rebound is a time of confirmation. It is a time when I am reminded that for this entire school year, this is my life. My life is in Honduras. This year of my life is to be spent living on this mountain, teaching in that classroom, visiting that lady at the market, spending time with these friends, and documenting it on this blog.

Numbers 33:2 says that as the Israelites traveled and camped, Moses wrote down all of their starting places and kept records of their journey. Now I've been reading Deuteronomy, and I have felt so encouraged. Moses has been giving a powerful pep-talk to the Israelites before they finally go in and take possession of the land that they had been promised. Throughout the whole speech, he goes to great lengths to remind them of the grace and faithfulness of God as shown in His deliverance all that He had brought them through.

Sometimes it's important to look back and remember.

I came here on August 8, 2009. I have now been here for seven months and five days. The countdown on my Windows Sidebar says that I'll be coming home in three months and six days. As a teacher who is gearing up to teach about fractions, I'm really seeing that a majority is behind me and the days are flying by... My mom is coming on Thursday for a long weekend (woohoo!), and then Spring Break will begin the following weekend. When we return from traveling adventures scattered all over this hemisphere, we will review for a week and then spend a week on testing. By then, we'll be more than half-way through April.

And you know what? I will be here.

I will be here until June 20th because my God has confirmed that it is right for me to be here.

Spring forward???

I can't believe it's already time for a time change... I feel like falling backward just happened! Of course, Honduras doesn't play the silly time-change game, so this just means I'll have to readjust to being on a different schedule than everyone at home. That's doable.

Today felt like summer. It was somewhere around 95 degrees. I enjoyed it. :)

I've also enjoyed my night. We went to McDonald's, hung out, and watched old episodes of the O.C.

I feel normal-ish.

My week, much like my young adult life, has felt like a roller coaster of ups and downs.

Today was more of an uphill climb. That's a nice way to enter into the weekend. :)

Maybe I'll stay in education... Maybe I'll go to grad school full-time this year. And then maybe Mrs. Miller will be able to find a spot for me again at Vincent. And maybe I'll work for a university someday. And maybe I'll change the world.

But for now, maybe I'll go to sleep to prepare for our morning market adventure...

To be a fly on the wall...

Sometimes I wish there were video cameras following my life...

My old roommate Leslie and I used to say that in moments like when she climbed inside of our new entertainment center from Target so that we could put it together, or the time when we snaked our own dryer vent (from the laundry room all the way out to the patio) to try to get the lent out. Or the raccoon... Whatever was blocking the path and leaving our dryer inefficient.

Today I wished that I could wear glasses that doubled as a camera with a direct-link to my blog.

I wished that when David (Dah-veed) stomped his feet and whined "Why?!?" as if he was six years old when he was told he could not go to the bathroom.

I wished that during social studies when I became queen, and they became my subjects possessing little pieces of construction paper (money) which they used to pay my taxes. In the perfect worlds of Kelly and Katherine, this would involve Starbursts or Skittles instead of paper, and it would last longer than one 20-minute lesson. Yet, after 20 (possibly 15) minutes of desk taxes, paper taxes, social studies book taxes, pencil taxes, talking taxes, touching-another -student taxes, leaning-back-in-your-chair taxes, and falling taxes (Pablo!), they very quickly got to the point. They revolted. They chanted, "Strike! Strike! Strike!" as their fists pumped in unity.

In truth, this was the whole goal of the lesson, and I used it as a hook to introduce the experience of the colonists as they endured The Sugar Act and The Stamp Act and moved toward rebellion and ultimately, The Revolution.

And I enjoyed doing it.

Then, when it was over and some of the kids were walking around collecting the pieces of paper, I was shocked to see how possessive some of them became! They were absolutely reluctant to give up their "money."

As Marco walked to my desk with the bag of "taxes," Marcelo trailed after him to turn in the papers he had been hiding. Both of them were innocently and inconspiculously (yeah right!) followed by Pablo who went to great lengths to look at me, smile and wave, and to keep his "money" hidden behind his back - even as he turned away from my desk and placed it in the bag without looking. By this time, everyone was watching him. He grinned, succeeded in his mission, and gave us all a thumbs up before returning to his seat - making a scene all the way there, of course...

I also wish for cameras almost daily as I have the wonderful opportunity to explain words to second-language learners. For instance, you'll never see the word "slobber" on a vocabulary list or an SAT test, but it just might pop up in a 5th grade chapter book, presenting a wonderful opportunity to expand your vocabulary.

There was also the day when we all learned the difference between a burp and a fart - and that fart can be a noun and a verb. One student burped in the face of another who then exclaimed, "Miss! (Meeeess!) He threw a fart in my face!" For one thing, the literal translation for farting from Spanish to English becomes "throwing a fart" because in Spanish, "fart" is only a noun. On top of that, we had to distinguish that burps and farts come from different places.

I mean, really... Who says the classroom isn't real-world? I'm obviously changing lives every single day here!

Sometimes I feel like my life could be a sitcom.

And Pablo would be the main character.

But his accent is so thick, there would have to be subtitles.

I miss home...

I miss home...

I would give anything to rewind time and pay the $700 roundtrip to have been at Brook Hills on Sunday. Except that I don't have that $700 just lying around. And I don't have a time machine.

I'll move into the inner city when I come home, as long as I don't have to live there alone...

So I could use some prayer to focus on blooming where I'm planted. Luckily (and that's a little sarcastic), I'm so busy - I rarely/barely have any time to think about what I feel like I'm missing.

And I'm praying that my daddy and Mr. Keith make it safely to Colombia and soak up the 100 degree temps without running into any problems with Colombian drug people.

Feeling confident... :)

Ladies and gentlemen... Gone are the days of jumpers embroidered with ABC's and apples paired with matching socks and keds...

The look of today's teacher is much more contemporary and, might I add, cute. :)

First, the inspiration... The new shoes:

Second: The ensemble, held together by the FABULOUS skirt courtesy of one amazing cousin, the one and only Jera Lyons. (I know it's not everyone's choice of style, but I get compliments EVERY SINGLE TIME I wear it!)

And just for kicks and giggles, my newest room decor - my Scripture wall... I'm sharpening my sword for this daily battle!!!

After 4 days...

One would think that 4 days of rest would provide the necessary motivation/preparation for the subsequent return to work.

One would be mistaken.

(Sidenote: My 9th grade algebra teacher had a poster in her classroom that I will never forget. It had a cat on it as the primary image, which I did not particularly care for, and the message said, "Once I thought I was wrong, but I was mistaken." As a self-aware fifteen year old, I realized that I was a bit of a proud know-it-all and I identified with this message... Haha!)

Tomorrow is Monday.

Ready or not, here it comes!

Now I just need to channel my inner Spongebob Squarepants - "I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready!"

:)