If I ever actually become a grown-up...

Someone please remind me that a "fixer-upper" is NOT a good idea! Remind me that although old houses are full of history and charm, they are also full of imperfections and frustration.

Today was a full-on work day at the Benton household, and that made for four very edgy workers. I'm starting to gain a better understanding of all the things I've been hearing about over the last few months. Honestly, I'm starting to think the biggest frustration isn't the old house with crooked corners, unlevel floors, and oddly designed rooms. It isn't even installers or builders or painters who do poor work. (Those are definitely problems, but maybe not the biggest ones.) Instead, it's all about the different opinions residing under this roof. God did not design any of us with gifts of mercy or encouragement or even laid-back and helpful spirits. Instead, as the Benton, Vandiver, Newman, and Wilkinson bloods run through our veins, we all become VERY strong-willed and opinionated - especially during tense and stressful times.

Oh yeah. And those four opinions often point in four different directions.

So instead of coming home to help and ease the tension, I've basically just thrown another strong set of opinions into the mix.

Me? Bossy??? Controlling?!?!

Never!

So in that aspect (and possibly only that aspect, or maybe that one and just a few more) I may be happy to board that plane in about a week.

I can't believe I've already been here for a week. I feel like I just got here... (This is me - trying not to cry.)

Of course, I know that in that other country that I claim to love, there are some ten and eleven year olds who I am proud to know. Pablo must be very bored at home over the break. He's been sending me funny messages and posting silly things on Facebook. As much as that kid drives me crazy when I feel like he's distracting from my goals and plans (see? controlling...) - I love him and think he's a great one.

Grad school has really been on my mind in the last few days. I'm hesitant to share or make grand statements about the future, but I'm still considering some applications for next year.

It's funny because I feel like God has really humbled me over the years when it comes to speaking about plans for the future.

Sidenote: My mom just walked through and said, "What are you doing?"
I told her that I am blogging.
Her reply: "On the Honduran Happenings? You're not in Honduras. You can't happen. Don't you know?"
Haha... :)

Anyway, as I was saying... First of all, I have pride issues and I LOVE to be right. Second of all, I've been wrong A LOT. So now I am filled with hesitation when it comes to making predictions and even decisions regarding plans.

All I know is that there already IS a plan. It's not uncertain or unknown. It's usually pieced together just a little at a time for me to see, but I like knowing that God knows EXACTLY what He's doing...

As for tomorrow, I will gather with my faith family for coorporate worship, enjoy a little more time with precious friends that I love dearly, and hopefully be a bit more helpful than contrary on the home front...

After all...

"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (ESV)

Feliz Navidad

"The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us. We have seen His glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth." John 1:14

I love realizing what Christmas is really about. I've been taught all my life that it's not about gifts or Santa or decorations or carols or cookies... I think many would insist that it's "Merry Christmas" instead of "Happy Holidays" because it's about Christ. But I'm coming to see that it's so much more than a baby in a manger. The Word became flesh. It's Emmanuel. It's God with us. That's life-changing. That's eternity-changing for those who believe.

My dad doesn't really like Christmas. Because of that, it's never been a big deal in our house... One aspect that I've come to enjoy in relation to that is that we don't feel tied to December 25th. It's not uncommon for us to exchange our few gifts on a different day. In fact, I would say it's uncommon for us to open presents on Christmas day. We decided yesterday afternoon to forego the time, effort, and materials for wrapping - and to just trade our gifts last night... That was really fun because (of course) I had been stocking up on things from Honduras for them, and I was excited to share the things I had chosen. I also received not one, but five Cubs shirts. I am now an official fan, thanks to my mom's talent for thrift store bargains!

Anyway... I enjoy the fact that we exchanged gifts before many people had even finished their last-minute shopping. For me, it took an emphasis off of those things. We by no means consider our holiday to be over just because the presents have been received. Instead, we can move on and focus on things of much greater significance.

Mom, Logan, and I spent a few hours at Children's Hospital today. Apparently much of the hospital shuts down on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. The families who are stuck there over the holiday are often forced to eat food from the vending machines because the cafeteria is closed. In response to this, a few families who know what it's like to face a terrifying diagnosis, an uncertain treatment, and extended time in a very small hospital room have gathered together to organize the delivery of holiday meals to any and all patients, families, and staff members that they can find and feed.

It was an incredible experience to see God meet needs through this ministry. Many of us fought tears as some of the survivors tried to share faith and hope and the real sight of life after cancer and hair after baldness. One mom wept because of her son's recent diagnosis only to find out he has the same name and cancer as my sister and to feel the support and encouragement of other parents who have been there and want to help. I couldn't even count how many people were blessed with a hot holiday meal today in all areas of the hospital - on 4-Tower (the cancer floor), in the bone marrow transplant unit, in the ICU, and in other areas. Even though there are many strict regulations in healthcare these days, I hope and pray that things like this will continue to be allowed because I know they are important to all who are a part of that community.

Sidenote: As we entered the hospital, my sister said, "I hate this place..." The memories that she associates with that building are not positive. However, I see it differently. Every time I step foot on the premises, I can't help but dream of working there. Some see it as a place of sickness and death, but I see a place of healing and hope. Sometimes I wonder if I should go back to school to be a child-life specialist...

Tonight was the Christmas Eve Service at church, and I thoroughly enjoyed a simple time of worship, hearing the Word, and taking the Lord's Supper. I love the way that I feel perfectly at home at a worship gathering there, even when I'm in a room with almost 2,000 people that I don't know. And I love that in the last year and a half, I have gotten to know and to love many people there...

So while many children spend tonight thinking and dreaming of presents or staying up to track Santa online - my family will sleep soundly. But tomorrow does not bring disappointment. With it comes an abundant feast, a time of family worship, possibly a movie, and hopefully a lot of cooperation and productivity in the area of turning this house back into a home.

Have I mentioned the house looks great?!?! I definitely love the new flooring and the wall colors. I'm excited that my mom has a functioning laundry room once again... This has been and still is a lot of work, but I am praying that a day of completion and rejoicing is just around the corner. :)

Good night all!

"For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."
Isaiah 9:6

This is the Honduras that has stolen my heart...

Tonight, I rode in a truck, that was crowded in the cab and in the back, pretty far out of the city up onto another mountain to pass out food to a very poor village. It was so nice to be reminded of why I fell in love with Honduras in the first place... We bounced up the dirt roads. Then we pulled off the "road" past a gate made of barbed wire and drive through a corn field to find about 50 Hondurans joined together to worship. Their village has no electricity, so as our headlights illuminated the previously dark scene, we were amazed to find them standing in a circle on and in front of a shabby porch to sing. The children warmed up to us quickly (and literally) as we placed our arms around them and tried to protect their bare arms from the cold temperatures. It was obvious that they had not bathed in awhile, and I was pleased to realize that many minutes after I began to touch and love them without hesitation. I'm thankful that I had no reservations in giving love... We sang a few songs in Spanish and a few in English, and I did my best to speak in Spanish to a little eight-year-old girl named Erika who wouldn't leave my side until we all gathered around the back of the truck to pass out the food to the families. This village sustains itself by farming and selling produce (mostly cabbage). I feel like God is constantly opening my eyes to poverty in new and different ways. I was blessed to be standing in the right spot so that I ended up being the one to greet each mother, ask her how many children she has, find out how old they are, and hand her a bag of rice, lard, toothbrushes, toothpaste, toy cars, and balloons. I don't know much Spanish, but I used what I knew and it was enough... I'm thankful that hugs and smiles are universal. :)

In other news, I'm confused about how ear drops are supposed to work if you put them in and then it feels like they all come pouring back out as soon as you stop tilting your head... I've read a lot about flying with ear infections, and I think I'm as prepared as possible for terrible pain - but I would really appreciate a miracle right about now...

Time to catch up...

I feel like I've been writing (and thinking) the words, "I should..." a lot lately. Perhaps I'm not satisfied with the things I am doing and the moments in which I choose to do them. For instance, right now, I should be using this brief appearance of stillness and quiet in my classroom to grade papers or work on lesson plans [for January!]. However, I also know that I should share my life with others - especially since phone calls, emails, and Skype dates have been few and far between as of late.

So this post will be a long one - a multi-day endeavor, to grow and to change whenever I catch a moment or think of an anecdote to share.

Hopefully it will be worthwhile.

Today (Wednesday) is chilly here on the mountain. It's overcast and just lacking the 85-degree warmth that we have grown accustomed to in the last week. However, I guess chilly is relative, right? Because the thermometer in my classroom is telling me that it is 68-degrees. That's practically a dream for many of my friends and family this month - and yet my feet (and my students) tell me it is cold. It makes me question how well I will handle the two weeks and two days that I will spend in the States. Of course, many of my friends here are going home to places like Indiana, Michigan, Pennsylvania, Iowa, and South Dakota. I certainly can't complain! :)

Last Thursday night, we had our annual Academia Los Pinares Elementary Christmas Program. It was one of the craziest things I have experienced in Honduras so far... I know the Lord was gracious to me that night - giving me flexibility, joy, and contentment beyond explanation. I felt his grace in the form of a sort of divine Prozac on a night when I would ordinarily be mad at

• the children running around outside in the dark when they should have been meeting in their classroom...
• the poorly planned program, before which the music teacher (that I thought was in charge) came to me to ask what time we were supposed to be there...
• the parents who stood up, walked around, and talked THROUGHOUT the presentation
• the parents who came up to the stage to take pictures of their beautiful hijos (children) before, during, and after the singing..
• the fifth graders who, when asked to sit on the floor under the basketball goal, proceeded to talk, move around, play loudly, and do almost everything but respectfully and attentively watch the K-4 program...

I can only give credit to the Lord for the fact that this ordinarily high-strung teacher was able to laugh and relax and just roll eyes at all the disorganization and chaos. :)

Last weekend was a busy one... Friday night I stayed with Emily in the city. I still thoroughly enjoy the fact that we're both from the Birmingham area, both from Shelby County Schools, and both from Brook Hills - and yet we met in Honduras. We listened to the recordings of the most recent Secret Church about angels, demons, and spiritual warfare and had good discussions... Things like that are almost like professional development for us because we sometimes receive questions from students about such matters. For instance, one of my kids recently asked if Lucifer was an angel who chose to sin and rebel against God, then do or could the current good angels choose to sin? I love the way children don't just accept things and move on like I do so often at this point in my life - but sometimes they process and analyze and ask questions.

Saturday morning, we got up pretty early for a Saturday to have breakfast with some of our friends and two Honduran women that go to our church. Although I didn't hear from her for a while, Emily and I have been "adopted" through our church by Doña Ruth... (In Spanish, Doña is like saying "Mrs." when you don't feel right calling a woman who is older than you by only her first name. For instance, my mentor at home is and always will be Mrs. Leigh Ann to me... I never just call her Leigh Ann. It doesn't feel right!!!)

Anyway, Doña Ruth and her sister met us at a coffee shop to pick us up. Then they drove us to her house where we explored in her garden, chased her pet (more about that in a second), ate waffles, and felt like we were in a real home for a little while. They have a bird in their yard that is supposed to be very loud when strangers approach. The only problem is, this one is timid and just runs and hides... Sounds like a great guard-bird, right? We had never seen anything like it before, and they were unable to tell us an English equivalent for the name. It had legs like a road-runner, a body like a quail, a neck like a duck, and large eyes that were set pretty far back on its head. It was funny.

That afternoon, I made homemade banana pudding and sweet tea to take to the Christmas parties that I was attending that night and the next afternoon. I love to bring a taste of the south to these Yankees in Honduras. Haha... :)

That night, we had our Christmas party at our principal's house. We all brought terrible White-Elephant gifts to exchange. (That's when you re-gift something awful that has been given to you.) It was pretty funny. Teachers are usually good at this kind of thing because we get lots of wonderful goodies from students with sweet hearts and good intentions!

Sunday was full with a Christmas pot-luck in the afternoon (which actually made me a little sick, so instead of grading papers as I had planned - I just stayed in bed reading for the rest of the afternoon) and a Care Group Christmas party that night. I think most of us could have used a day off after our weekend!

After school on Monday, I went to a Honduran, hole-in-the-wall salon to get my hair trimmed. It was quite an interesting experience... It felt a little like Steel Magnolias meets Honduras. Of course, it's always intimidating to put your hair in the hands of someone you don't know, but that feeling intensifies a bit when that person doesn't speak your language. It went just fine, although it's a little shorter than I had imagined for a trim - but it doesn't really matter. I'm just glad that I'm finally getting to the point where I feel like I can really live life here instead of saving so many things to be done at home where it will be familiar and comfortable. For instance, Twana and I are planning to go to a dentist when we get back from the break. And I'm getting used to the fact that you pharmacies sell medicines over-the-counter without a prescription. I haven't bought anything yet, but when I run out of something from home - I think I will!

After school on Tuesday, I went with Erika to meet a friend at Dunkin Donuts. She was buying a computer from a Japanese friend who is moving back to Japan, so Erika, her brother, and I all went to meet the girl. It was such a weird experience to be sitting at a table among such different cultures where three languages were intermingling for a conversation. After that, we met our other roommates for Erika's birthday dinner at a large Chinese restaurant called Mirawa. The food was good and reminded me of PF Changs, and I particularly loved reading a menu and ordering Chinese food in Spanish!

Yesterday was very long... We have faculty meetings on Wednesdays after school and are all required to work until 4:30. After that, my care group rode the bus down the mountain and then took two taxis to the only bowling alley in Tegucigalpa. This was what Erika requested for our care group celebration for her birthday. We were the only ones there for awhile, and it looked and sounded like we were at home... We put the bumpers up to help Erika (because she can't see), but we were all glad to bowl with bumpers! I actually won the game with a whopping total score of 117... Even with bumpers, we weren't that great! We finally got home at 8:30 and then grilled hot dogs and made s'mores (also requested by Erika...). It was all good, but I would have been pleased to get home and go to bed earlier than ten.

So here I am today (Thursday), trying to make the best of my last full day with my students for this year. Tomorrow is a medio dia (a half day!) full of Christmas activities, a class party, and what I'm sure will amount to pure craziness!

They've actually gotten off to a great start today. They have a few assignments that need to be finished before the vacation, so they've been working diligently in their seats. It's like a Christmas miracle! Haha...

Speaking of a Christmas miracle - my lowest student, who failed four subjects on the last report card, got an A on his last reading test! PTL!!! I'm so proud of him. His mom has been exhausting herself and working with him every night, and he's showing some improvement!!! She was thrilled when I told her about it, and she said it was like her Christmas present... :)

I'm actually excited to be staying on the mountain today - or at least, that's the plan. I'm going to go to the nurse (actually - we have a school doctor. I know... It's a hard-knock life.) during my next break because my ear hurts. I'm just wanting to see if it's infected and if I need an antibiotic. If I don't have to go into the city for medicine today, then I plan to stay after school to get some work done and then I will PACK to come home on Saturday!!!

Tomorrow, I will be leaving at 2:30 and going with a group to a poor Lenca village to help pass out food and clothes to the people for a Christmas celebration... I got really excited about this opportunity when I received an email from my friend Sarah that said, "They have no electricity, so bring a flashlight, bug spray, and a sweatshirt...". We'll be back late Friday night, and then I'll be heading to the airport for a full day of travel on Saturday. It should be fun though because a lot of us are flying to Atlanta together, and then we can hang out during our layovers in the ATL airport... I really enjoy the fellowship that we have in this community of sojourners...

Update: I went to the nurse/doctor and was diagnosed with an ear infection in my right ear. She gave me antibiotics and ear drops and told me to put a cotton ball in my ear when I fly on Saturday. Please pray that it all goes smoothly in that department. My flight is scheduled to leave Tegus at 1:25 and I am praying that there will not be a delay. I have heard of eardrums bursting while flying, so pray that the medicine will start to work over the next two days and that my ears will be safe.

Finally, I want to praise the Lord and rejoice because of the good things that have been happening recently. For instance, my parents just got new flooring put down in their house, and I can't wait to see it. I hear it's GORGEOUS! They have been working hard to get things done, and it's so great to celebrate the victory that comes after the battle... That's another thing I've been learning in my Esther Bible study. After the Jews were saved and defeated the Persian enemies, they rejoiced with a holiday, had food, and gave gifts to each other and to the poor. I know we're not commanded to celebrate Christmas or Easter - but I think we can look at the examples of feasts of remembrance in the Bible and see that our God is pleased when we remember what He has done by celebrating together.

(If you've read all of this and made it all the way to the end, then I'm sorry if there are spelling and/or grammatical errors in this... It's too long to proofread!)

Sleepy Rambling

Just six more days, and I'll be back home.

I love that word, and I feel so sad for the people who don't (or feel like they don't) have one...

I can't wait to be back with my friends and my church and most of all - my family. I love my momma more than anyone else on the face of this earth, and I can't wait to talk to her and laugh with her and hug her small frame while never wanting to let go.

And I'm excited to see my daddy again. We're going to have a lunch date... I've grown so fond of that time that we set aside for just the two of us. We usually like each other the most in those moments. :)

Of course, I'm hoping this visit will show a continuation of the strengthening friendship and love that Logan and I share. Our age difference has always been hard, and I'm thankful for those moments when we realize just how precious it is to have a sister...

I'm feeling all kinds of sappy tonight, but thankfully - there's no time to ramble on about those things. I wish I had the time and energy to share all about the crazy Christmas program from last Thursday when I realized that kids are crazy and unreserved because their parents are. I also wish I could share my thoughts and reactions to the Secret Church sermon that we listened to on Friday night called "Angels, Demons, and Spiritual Warfare." Let's just say, it was a good reminder and call to fight the good fight and pray. I also wish I could recount every detail from my breakfast with my Honduran adoptive mom and the White Elephant gift exchange at the elementary faculty Christmas party. Perhaps I would even divulge about the experience of wearing shorts and flip flops to a Christmas party today... :)

But instead, I know that I need to go to bed. This week is likely to be a challenge, and I need as much energy as possible to face whatever lies ahead. On the bright side, I realized recently that these next six days will pass by at the same speed regardless of whether they are good or bad. Unfortunately, as I've been wishing time away and watching it fly lately, I've also realized that the same thing will happen while I am home for two weeks. I know it will disappear much more quickly than I would like.

For now, I'll just revel in the joy and hope that come with anticipation. :)

I'm so excited!

Last night, I was asleep by now.

Not tonight.

I'm wide awake.

I've started making Christmas dates with some of my favorite people, and as long as my mom doesn't kill me for being gone so much while I'm "home," then this is already shaping up to be one of my favorite holidays ever...

Unfortunately, I still have six and a half days of work to get through before any of this can happen, and the last thing I want to do right now is grade the papers in my backpack!

Overall, today was much better than yesterday. Sometimes it seems as though six more months of this will be unbearable and impossible. ("This" being teaching this particular class all day, every day.) However, the video that I watched tonight from my Esther Bible study reminded me to fight the good fight and to depend on God to empower me and to turn it all around.

It (the video) also reminded me of this new strong desire to be teaching the Word... Of course, that's ironic to me because I teach Bible everyday. Lately I've been envisioning what it would be like to teach Sunday school or a Bible study to girls or young women...

But I'm thankful for the voices of wisdom in my life who keep reminding me to enjoy the NOW. So for now, I will proclaim the Word to 22 fifth graders. :)

Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day...

Today is a day that I'm not going to want to store in the memory books - but how can you forget a day when the PE teacher brings your class back early because they were being so bad?

And how can you forget a day when you cried in the principal's office because you were at your wit's end?

And how can you forget a day when that same principal chewed your class up one side and down the other for 45 minutes while he gave you a free lunch and took their recess?

I'm going to try to start forgetting now. By going to bed. At 8:00.

It's a glamorous life I lead...

Sometimes I wonder, "Are these really my twenties?!?!"

Worn out by lunchtime

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will." Romans 8:26-27

Today is one of those days when I want to pray, and I know it is the only thing that I can do to keep going, but I don't know what to pray for...

For the last four hours, this classroom has been occupied with students who are bored, tired, and hyper all at the same time.

The elementary spiritual life director came in for a special Bible lesson, and after about five minutes of trying to get them to listen to her, she gathered her things and threatened to just leave.

So what do you pray when that happens?

Can I pray, "God, please shut them up..."?

Haha.

I don't know. But I know He's my only answer...

Just two and a half more hours. I can do this and still have sanity at the end of the day.

And just 12 more days!

For the record...

- Another benefit of living and working in Honduras = not being at church with Alabama fans today... (Sorry friends, but it's true. I used to hate going to church during football season - and yes, I realize that it goes both ways.)

- I miss worshiping in English and am so excited to go to Brook Hills four times while I'm at home!

- I just "spring cleaned" my room in an effort to try to find my external hard drive - to no avail. :(

- I realized this week that I am really going to miss camp.

- I'm excited to see my parents' house and all of the changes that they have been making. I love hearing about their progress.

- I'm currently sitting all alone in my room listening to some of my favorite worship music on itunes with my earphones, and I can't resist the urge to sing - even though my roommates can probably just hear my voice traveling through the door.

- Today was sunny, high 70's, and not a cloud in the sky... But I'm excited to go home to sweaters and scarves.

- I have a real desire to teach a girls' Bible study. When? Where? Who? No clue...

- I was recently informed that a good way to memorize Scripture is to write it on index cards, place the cards in ziploc bags, and hang the bags in the shower. Then instead of reading the shampoo bottle over and over again, you can read the Word. :)

- I have not yet found success, but I still desire to memorize all of Romans 8. So that will probably be the first thing that I hang in the shower...

- I thoroughly miss my family.

- I have two students that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. There are stories that float around this compound of teachers who went home at Christmas and never came back - but I'll be back to keep my word and to spend six more months with two of the greatest kids I've ever met in my life.

- My friend Emily (also from Birmingham and Brook Hills) and I are going to have our own little Secret Church this Friday night.

- Even in Central America, I make a mean sweet tea.

- I still wish I could play the fiddle or the guitar, and yet I'm making no effort to learn either one.

- I get really excited when I think of my baby sister becoming a Montevallo Falcon. :)

- I'm already thinking of my travel plans for Spring Break - and I can't decide between Roatan, Honduras (and the ruins of Copan) or Costa Rica...

- At some point while I'm home, I am supposed to chat with two amazing women about some ways that I may be able to join their team that is putting together some incredible children's ministry curriculum about missions - and I hope and pray that the Lord will equip me to help in some way.

- If I come back here next year, I will most certainly come early for two weeks of language school. And if I don't come back, I would like to continue studying Spanish anyway.

- I'm singing in the faculty choir this Friday night for the Christmas program. I have no idea what I'm doing, but I enjoy it. :) We're singing "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" and "Light of the Stable" by Selah.

- This post is really for my mom who wishes that I would blog every day.

- There's a boy in my world now, and I get to see him three weeks from tomorrow... :)

- God is a great provider. My salary has been cut to a fourth of what it was last year, but He has provided in other ways, and I am actually able to save more this year than ever before.

- "For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given;
and the government shall be upon his shoulder,
and his name shall be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,

Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."
Isaiah 9:6

It really struck a chord...

How often do random magazine or webzine articles bring tears to your eyes because they're telling your story? It just happened to me as I read "Goodbye Guilt."

Wow.

Did I write that in my sleep? No? Oh, so I'm not the only one who has struggled with these thoughts and ideas?

Okay...

Amidst the intense excitement about coming home for Christmas, and the strong possibility of moving back to The States in late June, exists a huge weight of guilt.

Why don't I want to stay here for the rest of my life?

Why do I long for "home" and think of going back there?

Why is my Honduras experience so lacking in discomfort or sacrifice?

Yes. The Sunday School answers resound with promises of God's sovereignty and His good plan for my life...

I don't know what my future holds - but He does.

My mom tried to comfort and reassure me with a statement that even though I may struggle with the guilt of only living here for one year, many people never even dedicate that much. My instant response was that I cannot find solace in constantly comparing myself to others.

But just as quickly as I responded with that statement, I realized that part (or possibly most) of my guilt actually does stem from comparison. Instead of comparing myself to those who don't, I'm thinking of those who do. I'm thinking of my friends here who have already upgraded their one-year contract to a two-year commitment. I'm thinking of all the conversations in which I have heard and discussed that this school and these students need consistency and a community that is dedicated on a more long-term basis.

Guilt or no guilt, I will follow the Lord - even if that means following Him home.

I'm thankful that He has brought me here and that I have six and a half months remaining in this adventure.

I'm thankful that returning to a life in the United States does not mean the end of ministry or missions.

God can use me in Honduras, and He can use me at home.

So now I'm hopeful about my future and seeking His guidance one detail at a time...

Busy Bee...

As expected, the holiday season is upon us (even in tropical Honduras), and that means fewer blog posts. It's ironic though, because in the time when there's more to share - there's less sharing. Haha. Sorry about that.

Time for a rewind... I already posted about my Thanksgiving day. Honduras doesn't actually celebrate Thanksgiving because you know... the Pilgrims didn't settle a colony here or give thanks with these Native Americans. Anyway, no Thanksgiving = no Black Friday. However, a group of about 12-15 of us went back to Valle de los Angeles for some Christmas shopping. I'm flying with Delta two weeks from today, and I'm starting to think I'll have one 50-pound suitcase of things to leave at home after Christmas and another 50-pound suitcase of Christmas gifts for friends and family. I'm so excited... :)

That was also the day of the Iron Bowl, and I got home during halftime to a score that really surprised me. I had been preparing myself for a slaughter. Then I was only able to watch the third quarter because we were leaving again - but I enjoyed seeing my Tigers beating the Tide for a little while...

That evening, Twana, Hannah, Christa, John, and I took the rapidito (smallish bus that costs fifty cents to ride from the mountain into the city) into Tegus and squeezed into a taxi to go stay at the guest house owned and run by World Gospel Mission. Twana's aunt and uncle are missionaries here and part of their job is running this small compound. When they have teams in town doing ministry, they all stay there. However, we had the place all to ourselves! We hung out, played games, baked cookies, watched Fried Green Tomatoes, and slept... It was really nice because it felt like a relaxing getaway, even though we were just in the middle of the city. For those of you who know me really well, you know that I prefer to sleep to the sound of a small tabletop fan that sounds similar to a jet engine. The Lord surprised me with such a huge blessing in a small package when I walked into the room that Twana and I would share, only to see a fan exactly like the one I have at home sitting on the headboard of my bed!

We went to the mall that Saturday afternoon and purchased things for an operation shoebox that our faculty is putting together... It's for a school in the dump. Can you believe that? A school in a dump? It serves 138 children - and we're hoping to bless each and every one of them for Christmas.

That night we played speed Scrabble (seriously, my new favorite game) and enjoyed a pizza dinner with Twana's aunt and uncle before they brought us home.

Last Sunday was election day. Overall, it passed very peacefully. The last president was from the liberal party, and now the pendulum has swung to the other side and the country has elected the candidate from the conservative party. Unfortunately, that news was also followed with claims that he is even more corrupt than the guy he's replacing. Welcome to Honduras...

While Birmingham dealt with high temperatures in the 50's or something like that last Sunday, we were laying out and sweating at Twana's house. :)

Monday was declared a national holiday because of the elections, so we didn't have school. Instead, I went with six other people to a local national park called La Tigre. It's in a cloud forest (somewhat similar to a rain forest) at about 7,500 ft. elevation. We hiked for two and a half hours to a beautiful waterfall... Unfortunately, there's nothing quite like a trail marked "dificultad fuerte" (strong difficulty) to show you just how old and out of shape you are... even when you're just 25. Also, when half of a trail goes steeply downhill on the way to your destination - that means half of your trail will go steeply UPHILL as you try to return to your point of origin... My knees hurt for the next 24 hours!

This school week has been fine. As usual, the kids are getting hyper and excited about the holidays... I still think my favorite moments in the day come during reading class. We're reading Number the Stars together, and they're so sucked into the story. Then the moments when they spread out and read are so quiet and peaceful. :)

It was a busy workweek because progress reports went home yesterday. Many of them are disappointed with their grades. Thankfully, they will have two weeks between now and Christmas and two weeks after to try to improve.

I think my favorite kid-quote of the week was, "Miss... My breath smells. Like cheese." :)

Wednesday night, my care group met at Ben and Joy's apartment for dinner. Their place is so warm and welcoming (unlike mine) and it's also decorated for Christmas. It was so nice to watch them cook together and join together for some good food.

Thursday night was even more of an adventure. I attended a fancy Christmas dinner for parents and teachers at a really nice restaurant called La Cumbre. It's here on the mountain and looks out over the city. It was decorated for Christmas and approximately 120 of us sat around one LONG table. Something about it and the dim lighting felt like medieval times... Or maybe it just reminded me of feasts at Hogwarts in the Harry Potter movies. :) It was nice to get all dressed up and to eat a yummy dinner of salad, turkey, ham, stuffing, green bean casserole, sweet potato casserole, cranberry sauce, and a roll. Unfortunately, Hondurans eat really late. Our dinner started at 7:30 and we didn't get home until 10:30. That was way past my bedtime!

Last night I just relaxed in bed and talked on Skype. Now I'm in for a day of grading papers and watching the SEC championship... And possibly packing to come home! I need to figure out which things I haven't been using here so that I can take them back to Alabama. I'M COMING HOME TWO WEEKS FROM TODAY!!! =D

And in closing, here's a cheesy and yet true quote I heard the other night...

"God + Nothing = Everything."

Chew on that for a while... :)