My favorite time of each day here is at night. I brush my teeth and put on a soft t-shirt (that is, if I haven't been in my pajamas since 3:00!)... I turn on my fan and sound machine to relax to the steady hum. My lamp is on, and my overhead light is off. It's time to journal some prayers, read through/pray through Operation World (praying for Congo tonight...), and read the Scriptures from my Bible reading plan for the year.

This week is Psalms. It's been so refreshing after many hours of Leviticus, Numbers, Joshua, and Judges...

I know it's an extra good night in the Word when I have to get out of bed to grab a notecard to share a verse with someone or when I have to get my laptop to blog... Tonight called for both.

Kirsten and I have struggled together this year. Teaching 5th grade has been hard. She's so much stronger than I could ever be. Sometimes I don't know how she keeps facing her class day after day. As I read about David as he felt watched, targeted, trapped, and judged (and even chased) by his enemies, I thought of our students. I don't want to say that they're our enemies, but sometimes, when they're in full rebellion and attack mode, they act like it. Yet I'm encouraged by verses like this:

"You have kept count of my tossings,
put my tears in your bottle.
Are they not in your book?
Then my enemies will turn back
in the day when I call.
This I know, that God is for me."
Psalm 56:8-9

God is for me. And He KNOWS when I cry.

The verse that filled me with the urge to be an obnoxious blogger breaking the "maximum of one post a day" secret code was this:

"Look to the right and see:
there is none who takes notice of me;
no refuge remains for me;
no one cares for my soul."
Psalm 142:4

I know that lots of people here care about me, but they don't know me or care for me like my family does. This whole growing up thing is hard... As I've faced new and different challenges this year, I've longed for the days when I lived with my parents and they took care of me. They cared for my soul, and they also met my physical needs, cared for my emotions, and invested in my developing character. My home was a place of refuge, and I could fully rest because I knew they were protecting me, giving me what I needed, and supporting me.

So tonight as I read that and thought about how thankful I am to have a childhood that doesn't identify on this verse at all, even on a pity-party day when I may think it's telling my current story, I realized that there are lots of children out there who know the feelings associated with this verse. For them, there is no refuge. There is no one caring for their soul - or just caring for their heart after a hard day at school...

I often feel exhausted enough just trying to take care of myself and hold it all together, but remembering this reality reminds me that I want to take care of others. To provide a home that is a place of refuge, where souls and hearts can be cared for.

I think I would really like to foster and/or adopt someday...