And joy abounds...

I tried to write a post yesterday, but I got distracted or ran out of time... Regardless, the theme of my emotions are very much the same tonight.

I'm feeling a renewed sense of joy and thanksgiving.

In one part of the Esther Bible study, Beth Moore talks about when the tables turn... And she points out that the table has to be set against you for God to show up and show off by turning the table... I don't know how long this one will last, but this week has shown many signs of a table being turned - especially with one of my students.

Just two months ago, I was asking for prayers because I felt bullied by her. And my pride was wounded because I felt that being bullied by a fifth grader was ridiculous. This afternoon, she literally begged for me to let her call her mom to ask to stay after school to hang out because she didn't want to go home. I have no idea what has changed except for the influencing power of the Holy Spirit, but this week, she has not just put up with me. She has acted as if she may even like me. Praise the Lord...

Once in an interview for a teaching job, I was asked if I think it's important for my students to like me. I don't really know what kind of principal-pleasing answer I concocted, but now a few years later I'm willing to stand against the "professional" grain and boldy say, "YES - I think it's important for them to like me."

Except for the fact that I am still human to the core who likes being liked, it's not about acceptance of the approval of an eleven year old. After all, it's easy to convince myself that the main reason they don't like me is just because they're immature and not seeing me clearly - not because there's something in me that is not to be liked. :) However, I think it comes down to the reason I have stuck with teaching even this long... I've always loved "playing school," but teaching isn't quite the same now as when I instructed my dolls and my little sister. If I'm in it to play school, then all this extra work and responsibility is not worth it. I'm not even in it for the love of knowledge or the subjects I teach. Even though I can easily be distracted and forget my purpose, I know that I sought out a career building relationships with children so that I could get to know them, love them, and invest in them...

With that goal in mind, yes - it is important that they like me (or at least that some of them do - because I know that not everyone will) so that they feel comfortable with me, open up to me, and listen to me...

Today ended on such a high note for me. I sent 20 kids scattering in all directions toward various buses, and I walked lazily down the hill with two girls who are basically sitting on the fence right now between positive choices and negative ones that will impact their futures and the young women they are becoming. Then I stood outside the buses until the very last possible minute, not trying to control them or boss them around or force them to do something or be someone in order for me to accomplish my agenda of tasks... Instead, we stood there as friends who were identifying with each other and talking openly.

That is definitely one great thing about this school. In many ways, as long as teachers can stay on the good side of parents with high expectations, no one questions us for putting the personal in front of the professional when it comes to our interactions with our students. The lines of professionalism aren't drawn to form boundaries of distance and privacy. We are encouraged to be real with our students - to let them know who we really are in and outside the classroom and to get to know them that way as well...

So of course, this breakthrough shows up just before Spring Break - but if the Lord wants it to, then I know it will continue and maybe even grow even after a week off... I would love for people to join me in praying for that.

This blog is about to be quiet for almost a week while I vacation at the Caribbean. Seriously, it's a hard-knock life here in Honduras. (It really is for so many. I'm not taking that lightly.) Tomorrow at five pm, Twana, Hannah, and I will head down the mountain to spend the night with Emily. Then we will rise at some ungodly (is that blasphemous?) hour Saturday morning to go to Sketchville, Honduras to get on a bus. That bus will then take us (hopefully) to Tela, Honduras where we will lay on the beach, lay in hammocks, sight-see, eat, sleep, read, and relax until next Thursday. By the way, we may absolutely get what we pay for, but this whole trip will probably cost me less than $200, and I think that's even a generous estimate. We'll see how well I handle traveling Honduran-style. Supposedly our hotel has air-conditioning, so I'm thinking it could be much worse!

Okay... I still need to start the packing process, pray for the world (China tonight, I think), read the Word, and try to get a little sleep so I don't start my spring break off on a grumpy foot.

Love y'all! Have a great Semana Santa (Holy Week)!


Oh... and one more particularly joyous moment of the day:
One of my somewhat average, sometimes struggling students got the highest grade on today's social studies test. He beat all the obviously giften kids with a 102. When I showed him his grade, he practically flew back to his seat with uncontrollable, unreserved grinning and laughing. He sat in his chair in disbelief and told everyone around him about his school. Twenty seconds later, I heard, "Miss - Roberto's crying!" He was... I looked up to find him fighting back tears of joy. And then I looked away to fight back a few of my own.

Precious.